DEAR ABBY: I have been in love with a married man for more than 16 years. It started before he married, but I was married at the time, so he married her. He always told me he wouldn’t leave his wife, but I hoped he would.

Three weeks ago, I told him I could no longer go on this way and to have a great life. Two weeks later, he emailed me asking if he was still in my heart and said he was having doubts about his marriage. We live 400 miles apart, but I drove to see him last weekend.