Okay, I’ve found one. I’ve found a good, clean restaurant in a fashionable area of London with terrific food, where you can eat and drink to the absolute limit, and it’s not too expensive. Indeed, when they brought the bill, I was surprised, for the first time in maybe a year, by how reasonable it was. And the truth is, we could have ordered a fair bit less. At least £20 worth of food went uneaten, and £30 worth was rammed into completely full people who should have known better — especially as all three of them were restaurant critics.

I’m talking about a top-flight restaurant meal, with all the bits and pieces, that will top out for less than £100 for two, including booze.