When my daughter was in preschool, there was no hard and fast time she had to be there. Yes, technically the day started at 9 a.m. But if we got there at 9:15 a.m. and she missed a few minutes of circle time—her teacher still welcomed her with open arms and I got a nod from her teachers, a silent understanding that getting out the door with a 3-year-old was rough.

Oh, and did I mention I was usually half-dressed for this drop-off? My go-to was a chic mix of filthy Uggs and leggings that had been worn so many times that there were holes—but it didn’t matter because my oversized sweatshirt covered said holes up, doing double duty to cover up the fact that I was usually sans bra.

Now that my daughter is in elementary school with a non-negotiable start time that looms over us every morning like we’re being counted down on a high-stakes game show, trying to beat the first bell, things have only gotten worse . . . but more on that in a minute because this all brings me to TikTok star Alix Earle and her idea of school pick up fashion (but I’m including drop off because it’s one and the same). 

For the uninitiated, Earle is a 22-year-old known for her makeup tutorials and fashion in her very popular “Get Ready With Me” videos (aka GRWM). In one of her latest videos, she tries to decide on an appropriate outfit for a Miami Dolphins football game—her boyfriend, Braxton Berrios, plays wide receiver.

If you ask me, her final choice appears to be more “night on the town” than “day sweating at the game.”  She chose an orange bodysuit, distressed denim shorts, white heels (insisting they’re “comfy” and that she can “walk in them”), a Dolphins baseball cap, and the pièce de résistance—a minuscule Jimmy Choo clutch.

But the best is when Earle, without a hint of sarcasm says, “I feel like a mom picking up her kids from school . . .I don’t know why a mom would be dressed like this to pick her kids up from school, but that’s what I’m going to be dressed like.”

So much to unpack. First of all, I’m not a huge sports fan but I grew up in a family of massive fans—coincidentally I grew up in Miami and our team of choice was, of course, the Dolphins. I don’t know what a wide receiver does or how to spot the line of scrimmage but I do know that her white heels will be black and her feet will be blistered before the National Anthem is sung.

Now, back to Earle’s assessment that she looks like a mom picking her kids up from school. She basically answers her own question when she asks, “I don’t know why a mom would be dressed like this to pick her kids up from school?” It’s because no mom ever would. (OK, some moms may be dressed up if they’re coming from work or a meeting, but let’s be honest, they wouldn’t be dressed like Earle’s example.)

The one time I wore shoes that were not a hybrid of sneakers and slippers, I was asked no less than five times by other moms—and my daughter’s teacher—if I was “going anywhere special?” There’s not one mom on the planet, whether you have one kid or a dozen, that ever shows up at school (or anywhere with kids in tow) with a purse smaller than a suitcase. Those cute, micro bags that can hold maybe one tic tac and a lip gloss are useless for moms—unless you’re letting your kids use them for their dolls.

“Pick up at school” means having an arsenal to hold snacks, water, wipes, space to hold the 9,000 pieces of paper your kid is about to hand you (even though you’ll throw it all away), plus a collection of “nature” found on the playground that MUST be saved “forever” . . . you can keep filling in the blanks as every mom’s bag is filled with a random assortment of stuff.

Now, as for the clothes? I think Earle looks incredible in her orange bodysuit and distressed shorts. It’s one of those looks that’s meant to fool the world into thinking it’s “effortless.” News flash: nothing is “effortless” when you’re a mom. Moms barely have time to dress themselves considering getting our kids dressed can be tougher than childbirth some mornings.

My daughter acts shocked when I tell her it’s time to leave for school—like she hasn’t had to be out the door every day at the exact same time! And that’s when she suddenly has “nothing” to wear or finally takes a bite of breakfast and splatters yogurt all over the outfit we finally agreed upon.

I know the recommendation is parents “put on their own oxygen mask first” but that doesn’t apply to getting dressed in the morning. You must get your kids dressed first—and then you do whatever you can with the time left. Usually, you’re lucky if you walk out the door in shoes that match or have time to wipe away the mascara under your eyes (because you barely had time to wash your face before bed OR in the morning). 

It’s why I’m so relieved that I’m not the only mom calling Earle out!  Like @nickiunplugged who stitched Earle’s video together with her own—wearing leggings, slippers, a fleece, and a mom-bun—making it very clear, “That’s not what we look like.”

Then there’s Kerry (@momlifeafterdivorce) who has another take in her TikTok stitch. “You got one thing right”, she says. “You’re right. A mom would not be dressed like that, and if you think you’re going to be a mom that dresses like that, so did I, news flash, you won’t be.”

On the flip side though, there’s Brittany Jade (@brittanyjade___) who seems to be on board with doing it up for school pickup. She recreated Earle’s outfit in her TikTok, and says in the video, “c’mon boys, we’re going to Starbucks.”

There is one morning that lives rent-free in my mind. I actually had a few minutes to spare and put some thought into my attire, picking out a cute pair of paper bag shorts and a tank top.

As I brushed my daughter’s hair, I was proudly thinking, “Wow, we’re both dressed on time, we both look cute—this is going to be a great day!” Then my daughter turned around to stare at me quizzically. “Mommy?” she asked. “Yes, my love?” I answered, thinking she was about to tell me she didn’t do her homework or needed a form filled out. “I thought you were getting dressed,” she said, her little voice seeping with confusion. “Did you change into different pajamas to take me to school?”  

And that Alix Earle, is how moms dress for pick up and drop off . . .