I will die on the hill that “Twilight” is good, and I know that most people will disagree with me. But for the sake of the argument, let me explain exactly why the movies are good. 

If you are watching the “Twilight” movies in your adulthood, you must adjust your expectations. I’d like to hope that no one is watching the movies to compare them to the hit indie-flicks, like “The Lighthouse,” that Robert Pattinson has starred in recently that amassed serious critical acclaim, but rotten reviews always prove me wrong. 

At the most basic level, “Twilight” is incredibly entertaining. Arguably no other movie offers the corny, romantic one-liners with such poise as the “Twilight” movies do. While some of this comedic relief is completely unintentional, much of the awkward highschooler friendship dynamics are perfectly captured intentionally by director Catherine Hardwicke in the first film. 

Don’t even get me started on the CGI baby in the final film; it’s pure entertainment value. Arguing over whether these choices were intentional to parody the plot is beside the point. Take the films for what they are, and you will be much more satisfied with the outcome. 

A rocking soundtrack that boasts hits from Bon Iver and Paramore, the intense blue/green filter over the first film, and the overcast PNW coast all evoke a moody sort of nostalgia that make me want to drive to Forks and leave behind all my responsibilities. “Twilight” is escapism at its finest. 

Too many people approach the saga seeking some semblance of realism. I am not going as far to say that “Twilight” is camp, but it certainly exists somewhere in the abstract; it’s literally about a vampire and werewolf fighting over a teenage girl. 

So, take it for what it is. Laugh a little. There’s no better way to drown out the stress of approaching deadlines and the mundaneness of day-to-day life than by immersing yourself in a world where an elite society of bloodsuckers in Italy matters the most. 

Cinematic soot

The only reason a person would choose to watch Twilight is to make fun of how bad a movie could possibly be. The movie tried to fit into a dark romance category but failed both so the audience is left with the worst parts of each genre.

The premise of the Twilight series is that Bella, the main character, is in a love triangle with Edward and Jacob who are both different sides of the same red flag.

Throughout the movie the audience meets Edward who is an abusive stalker and gets away with his actions for being attractive. Edward, on multiple occasions, shows up in Bella’s room to watch her sleep and aggressively yells at her in the woods to explain his ability to murder her.

People tell you exactly who they are if you listen. Edward describes himself as a killer, a monster, and explains to Bella in detail how he could kill her. If that is not at least a warning sign for abuse, I do not know what is. 

There is nothing romantic about an abuser and these movies normalize that behavior for young girls. This inevitably influences young girls who might stay in a relationship because their partner acts like Edward. 

Bella has an intense dependency on Edward, as though he is her only reason for life. That is not healthy.

The relationships in this movie were bad but the acting, unfortunately, was worse. 

Both Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson took the worst possible direction when acting as each other’s love interests. Bella was blinking and biting her lip to a point where she was no longer the “quirky new girl” but the girl who shows signs of having a severe allergy to Washington State.

Stewart’s acting is not to be overshadowed by Robert Pattinson’s intense stares that leaves the audience feeling watched and uncomfortable rather than attracted to Edward.

When Bella first meets Edward he acts revolted by her. He covers his mouth and nose like he is about to vomit from her presence. If the movie is set up to be a romance, Edward should look at least somewhat attracted to the female lead.

Robert Pattinson, the actor for Edward Cullen said in a press interview, “When I read it, it seemed like it was a book that wasn’t supposed to be published.”

The author, Stephenie Meyer, said the movie came to her in a dream. After having to sit through another Twilight rewatch just to write this article, all I can say is that dwelling on dreams can only lead to horrible outcomes.