Learning that you need to take personal responsibility for your own moods can be a relationship saver. It’s especially important to avoid inflicting a bad mood onto your partner. What’s known in psychotherapy as “negative projection” can make someone you love doubt themselves and their relationship with you.

It takes some work to keep your life and relationships positive; it doesn’t happen on its own. Many people think that if they just continue bumping their way along through life, the world will right itself and give them their due, but it doesn’t work that way. To see positive actions coming your way, you need to take them.